I Forgot the Crock Pot

A few Sundays ago we were all getting ready to leave for church.  It was the usual chaos, goofing off, and yelling at kids which reminds me why I need to go to church in the first place.  I don't know if it is the recent addition of a fourth child or just my general absent mindedness which caused me to forget to start our normal crockpot meal for the potluck.  It is super easy (add chicken thighs, add bbq sauce, voila, bbq chicken), but I didn't start it before 9 a.m. which is essential because I don't want to give our entire congregation salmonella.

At any rate, I forgave myself this small mistake.  It would be okay, for one week, to not contribute to church lunch.  I have four kids.  I was trying to manage all of us out the door to be on time.  I am absent-minded, it's just who I am, I forget things and no one is going to give me a hard time about not bringing chicken for one week.  There will be plenty of food anyway.  I didn't even feel bad, really about forgetting.  It's just one of those things that happens.

Fast forward 10 minutes and I discover my sweet son playing with trains in his room, barefoot, tousled hair, and completely in his own world.  This was, of course, the exact moment we were supposed to be leaving for church.  He was supposed to be in his room getting his shoes and socks on.  He was supposed to be ready to go.  But, I forgave him this distraction.  I remembered he is my extra imaginative child who can make a story up out of any object he comes across.  I remembered he had already done so well getting his own breakfast and getting dressed for church.  I remembered he is six years old.

No, actually, I yelled.  I shrilly asked him what in the world he was doing and why wasn't he ready to go, we were going to be late and he didn't even have his socks out of the drawer and where were his shoes?!?  Yes, that is what I did.  There was no grace, no love, just sheer frustration and anger.  And later the questions in my own head of "oh my goodness, what am I teaching this child?"

I am working, by the grace of God, to be the mom that is slow to anger.  I am working on being the mom that isn't shocked when my kids disobey or sin (especially when I see my own attitudes thrown right back in my face!).  But I am far from there yet.  So, so far.  Sometimes it helps me to remember myself; I forgot the crock pot.